Sometimes, no matter what we do, people whom we thought we would spend our forever with just leave. We are left confused, wondering why they had to come into our lives and then leave suddenly.

It’s easy to come up with all kinds of theories once we find out they moved on so soon or claim they had been cheating on us and left us for that other person. It’s difficult to sit back and think that maybe we were to blame.

Many people will prefer to just walk out of the relationship when they realize they are no longer getting what they should. It’s even worse when it’s due to personal issues such as hygiene or sexual performance.

A fact is many people are extremely uncomfortable talking about certain personal issues with their partners. They worry that their partners will feel judged and unappreciated, hurt their pride, and they will accuse them of belittling and shaming them instead of embracing the feedback and working on themselves.

So they take the easier route, come up with random excuses or just break up anyway without giving a reason why. They tend to hope that maybe someday their partners will figure it out somehow or that someone else will be bolder and talk to them about the issues.

The reality is we don’t always have to blame them for leaving when we don’t have the slightest idea why they did. Why not scrutinize yourself as well it takes two to tango.

If you’ve had to deal with a mysterious breakup, then one of these might have been an uncomfortable reality to which your ex (or soon-to-be-ex) needed a solution but wasn’t courageous enough to say to your face.

1. Hygiene

Being a couple means you’re often physically closer to your partner. With such closeness, your partner can easily smell your body odour and other poor hygiene giveaways.

Perhaps you are naturally messy, but he/she can put up with this only for some time before craving for some neatness, cleanliness and freshness.

2. Sexual performance

Everyone has their preferences, and each couple is different. However, being sexually active doesn’t mean your partner is always satisfied. If there’s consistently poor sexual performance, chances are your partner will barely remember the encounters, and why blame them—there’s nothing worth remembering or holding onto.

3. Genitals size

His especially goes to the Mr. nice guy, who always wonders why he’s always dumped. Well, maybe they all hope you already know what no one is willing to say to your face.

This is, of course, a personal matter and pretty sensitive too. A lot of women leave their relationships because their partners are not close to the ‘standard’ size or length

4. Money

No one likes to be an ATM machine in a relationship. Chances are, they probably got fed up because you made them feel like your relationship was centred on them helping you out with your finances, sometimes wanting them to help your friends or family out, always running to them to borrow (and probably not repay at all), or you wanting every nice or extra piece of their personal belongings.

Some people get into a relationship with a Black-Friday mentality. They can’t wait to ‘shop’ everything they come across; they will scoop up everything in their path, your clothes, souvenirs, jewellery, anything. If you were that kind of lover, are you still surprised the relationship ended?

You shouldn’t be.

5. Laziness

You stopped trying after you knew they were into you. Caring and romance took a back seat. It’s possible they tried talking about your tendency to have grown comfortable, and you didn’t act as you should have.

The trouble with laziness is that there’s always someone else determined to put in all the effort and do whatever they can to win your partner over for keeps. And just like that, you lost him!

6. Conversation

It’s not a surprise that some people can talk dirty for an hour straight but become intimidated when topics about broader and more important issues come up—they become dumb and can’t contribute meaningful points.

If your partner expressed boredom or you got to that place where it seemed like there was nothing new or significant to talk about anymore, then your relationship had already ended.

When you’re with someone you care about, there’s a world of topics for you to discuss, stories to tell, plans to share, stuff about your day, emotions and thoughts to explore and experience together.

The Fire That Never Dies is The fire of Love


 

LA writes on various subjects, from family, relationships, and health to commodities in East Africa. She is a graduate of Journalism and Mass Communication from Masinde Muliro University. She is an advocate for women's and children's rights.

Leave A Reply

Exit mobile version