On Wednesdays, we eat out, arrive home so full, and chill. Why wait for Friday when you could start celebrating midweek?
I just had the creamiest mashed potatoes. I find the red potatoes taste well as mashed potatoes and the yellow ones as fries. The correct amount of milk and butter does the trick. Pro tip: add salt while the potatoes boil. I take mine with some well-cooked beef stew.
At home, my mum would add even more potatoes and peas. She’d then steam some cabbage, capsicum, and onions. But, I’m not home, so mashed potatoes, beef stew, and a glass of fresh mango juice—a balanced diet!
When I’m counting my blessings, not being rained on comes twice. The rain has blessed us since 7 p.m., seemingly saying, “Go to bed, human.”
Guess who forgot to close her window? I guess fighting mosquitos, is way better than nursing a cold. A win is a win, right?
On days like this, you know when to express love to yourself. You just got paid and want to spoil yourself, so go home and put on your cute silk pyjamas. That’s the mood, but some heavy socks, warm T-shirts, and warm Mickey Mouse pyjamas are the plan. You’d still turn the heater on but with the high cost of electricity today? Assuming money isn’t a problem. Turn on your heater, and silk pyjamas as you dance around, then puff! Darkness! Better safe than sorry, better safe than sorry, folks.
If you’re cuddled up and wondering how single people cope, welcome. We make big batches of tea or coffee, sip on warm or hot water, dress warmly, and avoid couples. We also add extra blankets and extra pillows, we are lonely not alone.
“We shouldn’t judge him; we don’t know what’s going on…”
Sometimes we listen to our neighbours. No, we are not snooping, the walls are thin.
“Come on Natasha, you know Ian is the coolest guy we know.”
Dear neighbour, please put Natasha on the loudspeaker. I need to hear both sides of the story.
“I think Ian was just having a hard day”
I do have my hard days, but what did Ian do?
“I’m not taking sides…”
“No, I don’t support his actions”
Okay, what did Ian do?
“Natasha, I wouldn’t slap you”
I think I should go to bed. Maybe from my bed, I can hear Natasha’s argument.
“I’m only giving him grace, that doesn’t mean I would beat you.”
My mama always says, “Birds of a feather flock together.”
“You’ve met him. He can barely hurt a fly…”
“I’m not taking sides; Eunice might have said something to make him react the way he did…
“Come on baby, you know that’s not what I mean.”
So, Natasha is the fine woman you brought over. The one you fixed pancakes for. Made some aromatic pilau, which came as a surprise last, I checked we all skipped lunch. Then she made you chapos. No wonder you suddenly like Mbosso and Harmonize. Love changes people.
“Yes, we have to go get her from her parents. Ian will have to apologize to her family.”
“You know I’d never want to scar that beautiful face…”
“I only want your beautiful brown eyes crying over happiness.”
Aaaw!, That’s so beautiful.
I need another mug of hot cocoa. I’d have tea, but my neighbour is serving it.
“I’m not dismissing her experience, neither I’m I trying to enable Ian’s behaviour. It is just that sometimes we need to let grown-ups handle their issues how they see best. It happened once, but it doesn’t mean he will keep hitting her.
“I think we should mind our business, the two will get back together. If you ask Eunice to stay away, reconsider him. She will go back and say you wanted her man. Baby, you know how women are.”
“That’s different if my neighbour screams…”
Hold up, how did I become part of the conversation?
“If Maria screams I’d go to her rescue. I’ve never seen a man with her…”
I grab my phone, search through and find my play store. Download three dating apps. What do you mean you’ve never seen me with a man? You just moved in. You moved in six months ago.
“…but if she starts dating and her guy roughs her up. I have no business stopping it.”
I gasp, I thought he was one of the decent ones. I unhung his shirts one afternoon when the rain graced us. I’m hurt.
“I think with these wars we should mind our own business…”
Well, I should start minding my own business too. Like that time, I shared a jerrican of water, because you forgot to wake up fetch. I should mind my own business when your clothes are rained on. My salt, matchbox and I should mind our business. Meow meow will no longer help you fight the rodents in your house. Let’s all mind our business.
“My mum and my dad fought all the time. They celebrated 30 years together last month.”
“I turned out fine, I don’t need therapy. I don’t need to unlearn anything.”
Sir, we all need therapy. We do need to unlearn a lot. You, sir, need to unlearn a lot.
“Their culture allows it, but Eunice says it’s prohibited to fight a woman. This is why I say marry from your tribe.”
“Natasha, I didn’t say I’m breaking up with you.”
What did you mean? I heard Natasha speak some fluent Swahili, the nasal Swahili. You speak broken Swahili. Sir, explain what you meant.
“What I mean is, we both like each other. We wouldn’t fight…”
“I don’t mean Ian and Eunice hate each other.”
My alarm goes off. Yes, I set alarms for everything. It’s bedtime now. I’d love to listen, but this isn’t as interesting as I thought. If someone slapped me I’d…
Goodnight to me, I love myself. I will sleep well and I will have amazing dreams. See you in the morning Maria.
